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God is Underwater

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Marko Blažević

Marko Blažević

 

I remember it all very clearly. I was very conservative. Sitting in my girlfriend’s dorm room, we watched the horrific images of people begging for help from their roofs. We’d all just witnessed one of the worst natural disasters ever. In the midst of it all, we were glued to the television. Eventually, we struck up a conversation about the theological ramifications of it all. She offered a quick observation, “Despite their sin, God is in New Orleans.” I didn’t buy it and forcefully replied, “God left a long time ago. That’s why they’re underwater.”

 

There is nothing more human than to ask, “Why?” Desperate for comfort, people rush to an answer. The problem is that such answers aren’t real. The question is the only thing concrete.

 

The tornado was devastating. Dozens and dozens of people died. Places that I’d sat many times were destroyed. People roamed the destruction. Bodies were still being pulled from the rubble. It seemed that all of the answers had blown away. In the distance, I saw people gathered around a cross. Wondering what was going on, I walked toward it all. The preacher kept shouting, “God loves us all.” I knew differently. God was dead. Love was gone. The wind had taken it all.

 

Disbelief is belief. Pain is real. God is not. There is reality in denial. There is no belief. Maybe God is not God. Maybe God is a myth. Maybe God is a dream. Maybe not. Maybe.

 

The water overwhelmed the van. They were just trying to evacuate. Within seconds, they were completely submerged. Yanking at door handles. Kicking windows. Screaming louder and louder. Doors leaking. Windows failing. Tears falling. Prayers lifting. Water filled their lungs. Eyes began to close. The end came quickly. God drowned.

 

God is in the question.

 

God is underwater.

 

Amen.

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